Homeless, Not Worthless

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San Francisco, California, United States

Supporters

Dear Community,

I have found myself in a situation that is untenable. I need your help, before my potential is wasted forever.

I did not spend my life focused on money. I spent my life, learning what it takes to alleviate suffering and how to apply that on a systemic level. That’s my purpose. I know what my Mission is. I just can’t accomplish it without your help. Sorry it took me a minute to figure that out. Life is not always so linear. Just because I am in a crap situation now, does not mean I will always be…and the situational depression is no joke. This is super not fun.

I have a chronic illness called Adrenal Insufficiency. It is a brutal condition. It is a stress disease. Stress quickly becomes a life threatening cycle. Being homeless, disabled and ill is consistently stressful, so I am consistently sick. So sick that I can’t stand for more than a few minutes. I find it hard to walk around the block and I am in constant excruciating pain, so it is rare that I go to events or see people. I was in 5 car accidents in 3 years, the 4th one put me in a wheelchair. I can walk again now, but just barely. I have not picked up a hula hoop in several years. I used to be able to twirl 7 balls of fire. Right now I am struggling with basic stuff because I have too many challenging variables.

Anyone that knows me, knows I have had a great life, with so much joy, that I only ever wanted to share all of my abundance. However, it is pretty hard to enjoy life when one feels like their brain is on fire, their back is in a vise and most of your muscles are tensed to the point where breathing must be a conscious act. I feel so isolated, and if it was not for the 94 year old man that allows me to park in front of his house and get electricity, it would feel like I was in solitary confinement in this thing. I did not realize that my 1400 friends were going to abandon me when things got bad. My family is one of the most dysfunctional that I know, and it turns out that the family that I thought was sane and liberal is actually really quite bigoted, racist, classist and cruel. It turns out I am a terrible judge of people? Always seeing the best in people…has turned out to be a real liability…because so many people have gone out of their way to show me their worst. I am really confused by Humans. It’s a rough time to have a crisis.

I am not an entitled person, I am not asking for fabulosity so I can go glamping at festivals. I am not asking you to make my life pleasant. I am asking for help because my situation is so overwhelming, that almost everyone I talk to is intantly maxed as soon as I describe it. It’s pretty terrifying, and after 1000 days of excruciating pain…I often think about applying for Death With Dignity, because I don’t feel like there is any dignity in my current situation.

I chose to live in an RV because I thought it would minimize my needs, and make functioning easier. However, my RV is old, and I got scammed pretty hard when I bought in under super stressful crisis circumstances. I had one week to buy an RV or be homeless.

I am an extremely frugal human. I don’t buy new things. I do my best to always reuse, and find things that are used, so that I can reduce my carbon footprint and use things that still have life.

I hired some guys to fix my RV and they completely destroyed it. It is now worth nothing. I could try and pass it off to some thoughtless Burner, but integrity is my highest value, and I would not pass on the negative experience that someone did to me. That said, this RV leaks, and is no longer reparable with out significant investment. Someone who can physically do the work will have a super solid engine and a really fun vacation toy… and definitely won’t make it through another winter as a full time living space. It is great to take to the playa, and that is about it. It is not functional as a full time vehicle, which is what I need.

In the beginning of September the Burning Man festival will occur in the Nevada desert, and after that there will be a market of surplus RV’s, and I hope to raise enough money to purchase one. If miracles are possible, perhaps someone with abundance will offer me theirs instead of cleaning it? Crazier things have happened! I will try and sell or rent this one, but it honestly needs a significant amount of work to be functional. If the community provides me with a functional RV, I will donate this one to another person who is currently living in a tent and needs a home. If you help me, you will be helping two homeless people.

My goal is raise $15,000 so that I can get a functional RV that has the basic requirements that I need so that I can get out of the city and into nature to heal my body. Living in the city in a broken RV has worn me down, and I am so exhausted I can’t really function at all. It is really hard to know that within me is the potential to heal this country in a profound way. However, if all of my energy is consumed by survival such that I am not able to live my purpose and complete my mission, surviving becomes a hell that no amount of inspiration can overcome. I can’t sit here, watching my life fall apart for another year. It stresses me out, makes me sicker…and the cycle repeats endlessly. I don’t want to lose my mind, and become a bitter old lady. Now I understand why so many old people are cranky. When society throws you away, its pretty hard to remain chipper.

If you know me at all, you know that I have amazing potential. I understand that I had to go through this experience to have the level of empathy required to create a truly great outcome that can overcome some of the pain and suffering that this country is experiencing. It would be a shame to let all of that potential go to waste, because I can’t manage to find housing in this crazy housing crisis. 1 bedroom apartments in San Francisco just averaged at $3500. I have reached out to every social worker I can find…and even though I qualify for disabled housing…people who don’t have RV’s and are living in tents get priority, which makes sense…and is a frustrating catch 22. My cat has kept me alive through these hard times, and I am not going to abandon her when she needs me most, and most SRO’s don’t allow pets.

I am sorry that this is not more inspirational. I have always been authentic, and I am just telling the truth. I have nothing to prove at this point.

This is my reality. I take responsibility for all the choices that have led me to this situation…and I don’t want to manipulate anyone into feeling pity for me. It is incredibly interesting to be both the victim of unbelievably bad luck (the movie of my life is going to be amazing!) and the blessing of so much privilege. I am blessed with the consciousness to see the utility of my situation, and the potential voice that I can bring to homelessness…if I can get out of this crisis before it kills me. It is the intersection of those two dichotomies and an open and willing mind, that will allow me to bring systems to this world that will start processes of great healing. However, if the stress kills me before I can write it down…then all of this suffering was for nothing. I hope someday that I can say that it was the darkness before the dawn.

Before I can heal anyone else, I have to heal myself. In order to heal, I need to feel safe, I need to be able to sleep, and I need to be able to function in basic ways. The list of problems I am facing is too long and too overwhelming, and because I physically can’t do it myself…I am stuck. I deserve to exist, and I am just looking for a place to do that.

If you believe in miracles, that’s great…I am open to miracles and I will appreciate your thoughts and prayers. That said, the Universe is clearing my karma right now, and I don’t suggest that you rely on the Cosmic Force to save me. If you understood the incredible list of tragic crises I have already lived through, you would understand that now is not the time to leave it to God. If you want someone to do God’s work, you can count on me to accomplish my Mission…but I need more than thoughts and prayers. I need a home.

However if you believe in science, then statistically, I am a good investment. It’s unlikely that the Universe invested this much energy into creating me, just to let me go to waste. It’s hard to create someone who will generate significant goodwill, empathy in action and balance generational karma. Most people just don’t have the perspective to invest themselves with that level of intensity. If I live throught this…then my Mission will actually adress the problem of racism in this country. The Universe gave me a few years with no distractions to think it through. It’s a pretty solid plan now!

Thank you for your attention. If you don’t have anything to offer financially, there are a variety of ways that you can help me remotely with as little as 15 minutes to spare. If the right 10 people offered me an hour of their time, I could probably make the connections that I need to make to get out of this hole within a month!

The best way to support me if you don’t have financial resources is to send this to someone you know that does have financial resources, and specifically ask them to support me. If you believe that I am here to do something good in this world…then speak that belief, and help me reach my goal so that I can do what I am supposed to do to make this world a better place. The only way I succeed is with your support, and your willingness to pass this, post this, and pray for this!

Blessed Be

Jamie Luv

Est. Delivery Date: As soon as you tell me what colors you prefer, and I can ship it out.

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Est. Delivery Date: My goal will be to get them out as soon as possible, and I have to pack and move in the meantime. So let’s set a date of 3 months just to give me some wiggle room.

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Est. Delivery Date: My goal will be to get them out as soon as possible, and I have to pack and move in the meantime. So let’s set a date of 3 months just to give me some wiggle room.

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Est. Delivery Date: Call me immediately to schedule a date before the playa!

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Anonymous

4 years ago

$25

Deirdre Montgomerie

6 years ago

$100

Ra So

6 years ago

$20

Crash Anova

6 years ago

$25

Ana Rivero

6 years ago

$25

Anonymous

7 years ago

$10

Daniel Kalafus

7 years ago

$50

Carl F

7 years ago

$5

John Rodriguez

7 years ago

$20

Michael Barrie

7 years ago

$100

Rachael Brennan

7 years ago

$10

Anonymous

7 years ago

$400

Michelle Veneziano

7 years ago

$100

Ruby Tuesdae

7 years ago

$300

Sannie Cudzer

7 years ago

$10

Ian Baker

7 years ago

$25

Timothy Hogan

7 years ago

$20

Anonymous

7 years ago

$5

yurik riegel

7 years ago

$15

Nicolle Aleman

7 years ago

$25

Demuse Can

Happy Birthday! May all the money you need for your vision, come to you with ease. Love love love

6 years ago

John Rodriguez

Hey Jaime, I saw Angelique post this on FB. It’s been a few decades since we saw each other last, sorry to hear life’s been hard on you lately. Hopefully things will be looking up for you soon 🙂 John

7 years ago

Ruby Tuesdae

I just donated. JamieLuv is a wonderful human, and sometimes even an epic manifestress like herself needs assistance. What has happened to her in the last few months is just too much, and as a community, we can help her get her feet back under her. Please, if you can help, do. We need more JamieLuv in the world.

7 years ago

Yurik Riegel

$50

Dan Kalafus

$50

Felicia Kramarz

$25

Damien Jones

$0

Andy Davis

$0

Dan Kalafus

Andy Davis

Brian O’Connell

Damien Jones

Dan Kalafus

Felicia Kramarz

Glenn Meader

Jamie Luv Najmark

Keith Flippin

Yurik Riegel